Your vagina is the source of your female self. Before anything else is known about you, your sex announces your identity loud and clear. Your vagina is like a flag signalling to the world you are female.
Many people see it as a sign that you are a second-class citizen. In both explicit and subtle ways, women and girls are taught to be ashamed of their bodies and vaginas. Women and girls are taught misinformation and lies about their bodies and vaginas. Violence and abuse cause women and girls to live in fear with their vaginas. Women and girls are targeted, mutilated, attacked, raped, and killed simply because they have vaginas.
Our vaginas are used against us to keep us controlled through fear, shame and ignorance. One way to end this patriarchal control is to talk openly about your vagina and listen to your vagina. Yes, listen; she has lips for a reason.
Communication is key to every healthy relationship. A healthy relationship with your vagina, will make you proud to be female and fully aware and empowered about who you are and your rightful place in your body and in the world.
Please answers these questions to get in touch with your vagina. She has been silenced, spoken about, spoken for and in the service of others for too long. If you listen to your vagina and speak up for your vagina, you will stand up for yourself.
My friend and Cork Feminista co-organizer, Liz Madden, and I answered our vagina questions together. We discovered a lot about our vaginas and ourselves and learned that these questions can dredge up some unexpected emotions.
It may be helpful to answer them with a friend whom you can share your feelings with. I ask that you listen with care and sensitivity to your answers as well as your friend’s answers. Then, write a description of your friend’s vagina, based on any key traits or recurring theme or message from her vagina, to introduce her to her vagina. If you choose to answer these questions alone, write a description of your vagina.
If you feel you are stuck or do not have the answers, it may be because you have never thought of your vagina in this way. Be gentle with yourself and your vagina. Do not feel pressure to find the “right” answers. Your vagina’s answers are subject to change. It may help to trust your instincts and write the first thought that comes from your vagina.
1. What is your vagina’s name?
2a. What does she feel like?
2b. What does she like to feel?
3a. What does she like look like?
3b. What does she like to see?
4a. What does she smell like?
4b. What does she like to smell?
5. What is her favorite sound?
6. What makes her angry?
7. What makes her happy?
8. What makes her sad?
9. What makes her laugh?
10. If she could be anything in the world for one day, what would she like to be?
11. If she could meet anyone in history or present, who would she most like to meet?
12. What does she love about herself?
13. What does she dislike about herself?
14. What does she love about other vaginas?
15. What does she want you to change about your life?
16. What does she want to change about the world or your society?
17. What scares her?
18. What is her special talent?
19. What does she pray or hope for?
20. What does she want you to know?
If you would like your answers shared on Cork Feminsta’s blog, please send your answers to email@example.com. Self-portraits and photos of your vagina are also welcome and will be posted with your anwers.
~written by Emily Davis-Fletcher on behalf of Cork Feminista.
20 Questions for your Vagina developed by Emily Davis-Fletcher.
Answering process developed in conjunction with Liz Madden.
Cork Feminista is a volunteer-based, nonprofit organization. Please make a donation on the top right side of this page to support our development and fund monthly meetings and campaigns to promote feminist issues and causes.
If you would like to reinforce the wisdom of your vagina with the wisdom of other women, Cork Feminista recommends the following resources:
The Vagina Monolgues by Eve Ensler
What’s Up Down There?: Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend by Lissa Rankin, M.D.
The Perfect Vagina, a documentary.
Artwork, in order of appearance:
The Venus of Hohles Fels, circa 37,000 B.C., Germany
Rene Magritte, Le Viol [The Rape], 1934
Egon Shiele, Reclining Female Nude with Violet Stockings, 1910
Georgia O’Keeffe, Black Iris, 1926
Judy Chicago, Emily Dickinson Plate from The Dinner Party
Gustave Courbet, L ‘Origin du monde [The Origin of the World], 1866
Aurignacian vulvar representation, circa 35,000 B.C., France